The ability to piss flames.

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The ability to fart into a crowd silently , but in turn shit you pants .

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The power to be Justin Bieber and be cool at the same time

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The power to never be cold, but only when it is above 80 degrees.

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Dust-mite communication. Attack my army of microscopic and fairly harmless beasts!

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captain obvious

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The power to fly only when in contact with the ground

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The power to start gasping for air seconds after touching a keyb... then to die from hyperventilation seconds after using your mou...

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The power to grow your own armpit hair at a rate of 1 ft/day, and change its color at will.

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The ability to be invisible whenever you take a slefie

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Autokinesis (the ability to move your own body).

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The power to fall without screaming.

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The power to be Chuck Norris. Oh wait..

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The amazing ability to despise round objects.

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The power to change delicious chocolate fudge into mud of the exact colour and texture.

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The ability to turn only your car in the direction in which the president of Zambia is looking.

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The power to look out any window in the world and immediately get it on the face by a bald eagle.

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the power to make men funnier smarter and more athletic then womer.

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the power to projectile vomit every time you attempt to laugh.

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The ability to not freak out when your mom calls you

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The ability to instantle tangle your hair.

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the power to make tom lose his friends on myspace

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the power to fart out of your penis

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The power to help bitches stay alive! Bitches love staying alive!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!