The power to shoot your teeth at the force of a Nerf gun.

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The power to die at will

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The ability to pirate every song you want without getting caught. However, they can only be Justin Bieber songs

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The power to write about pointless superpowers.

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The power to run half as fast as whoever is chasing you.

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Superheroes: The power to run away from danger.

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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Solar Powered Vampire Abilities

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Oye sun teri ma ka saki na ka

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The ability to see things only as their component atoms.

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The power to breathe through your mouth when you have a stuffy nose

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The ability to make any amount of money appear in your wallet. The money is in the form of the Neptunarian Dollar, which has no value anywhere on Earth.

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time travel that ownly have 5 time before loose it

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The power to lick your elbow if it is coated with butter at exactly 36 degrees Celsius.

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The power to shrink your erection whenevery you want.

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The power to stop people from walking through closed doors.

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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The ability to teach someone how to blink.

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Nope. Just nope.

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The power to put your pants on, two legs at a time.

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the ability to dice a watermelon by looking at it but when you eat any of the diced watermelon a magic watermelon grows in your stomach and you look fat

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The ability to see into the present.

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the power to fart every time you blink

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The power to escape reality by entering the magical land of skyrim via your PS3.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!