the power to think up AWSOME funny pointless powers but never have the guts to put them on Pointless Superpowers

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the power to masturbate just one time a day

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the ability to die but to reappear as a strange families pet turkey

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The power to understand myspace

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The power to kill yourself to take out a criminal... except for the fact that when you kill yourself you literally might as well be throwing a marshmallow at someone.

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The ability to kill Abraham Lincoln with the power of your thoughts. Hey, wait a minute...

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The power to be special just like everyone else.

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The ability to fart into a crowd silently , but in turn shit you pants .

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The power to stub the same toe multiple times.

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The power to have a blue, silhouetted body, and a trollface for a head.

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The power to produce up to 20 gummy bears at once through the process of budding

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The useless pewer to increase your useless power at will! Moral: THE POWER TO SPAWN IN THE CENTER OF THE SUN AFTER DEATH INCREASE!

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The power to run on water when there is no water

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The power to fly but you will only last in the air for 3 seconds

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The power to pass incredibly powerful gas at the most inconvenient of times

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the power to fire your bellybutton lint out of your navel at a speed of 3 miles per hour.

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The power to find something that isn't in the last place you look.

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The ability to screw up everything you say in the language that the country you are in speaks

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The ability to make your fingernails grow an inch whenever you like, but only on a Tuesday

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SGNM! Super Grammar Nazi Man!

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The power to read Sarah Palin's mind

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The ability to never pick up on sarcasm.

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the power to relive the least important moments in history

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The power to create the superduper best pointless power

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!