the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

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the ability to make your eyes pop out.

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The power to shoot spiderwebs but only out of your fully erect dick

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The power to accidently find all spoilers online before you watch a film or an episode of a series.

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The power to poop AAA batteries when you only need AA's.

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the ability to sing like t-pain without the autotune

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The power to eat 100kgs of ice cream and only get type 2 diabetes

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The power to touch someone's face while watching rain burn.

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The ability to pee as a gas, not a liquid

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The ability to look directly at the sun without damaging your eyes.

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The ability to fall asleep before the end of the movie

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The power to write any thing on your chest with clear paint

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The ability to die whenever you think of death.

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black people

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the ability to go the speed limit

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The power to grow a money tree once every 5 years that grows 1 penny every 10 years.

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The ability to shoot acorns from your nipples

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The ability to sense cheese.

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ???l?q? ???

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The characteristic that every competition in which you prefer one competitor over the other ends in a tie. So you never lose, but you never win either.

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the power to turn star wars figurines into sticky notes, only on sunday afternoons

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The power to convince two people I am not taking sides while simultaneously taking both sides.

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The ability to change Celsius to Farenheit.

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The power to teleport massive objects one inch above your head.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!