The power to pee out blood at will

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The ability to procrastinate when you have absolutely no work to do

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The ability to die at will.

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The power to talk to animals. Especially when you tell your friend to dress like one.

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The power to shatter a mirror just by staring at it.

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The ability autotune text.

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The power to be awake when you're not sleeping.

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The power to wait 8 to 10 business days.

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The ability to cut your stool in to tiny pieces smaller than a pea

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The ability to unravel a ball of yarn with your mind

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The power to make a small hamster yawn.

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the power to drive well and see (applies to asians)

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Turning invisible when no one is watching you. -Alex

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The power to have courage to tell hitler that you are jew

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The power to walk on water, but only when it is below 0 Degrees Celsius.

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The power to inhale and exhale the same air at once.

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the power to be a tissu paper in a horny teenagers bedroom but only if your a strait male- wisecrack3

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The power to poop kittens with mittens

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The power to view the world through Apples Retina Display.

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The power to bleed when your grandmother kisses you.

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The ability to control yourself while sleepwalking, but only when you're awake

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The power to telekinetically pick your nose and eat it.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!