The power to open a walnut with your mind

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The power to lose your sense of touch and orgasm uncontrollably for five minutes.

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My charms is my superpower, but damn I cant shut up after spending some quality time with the ladies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! MY BODY WAS NOT READY! I feel like yelling out my real name, but you know, if you know me (I am easily recognizable) the girls I spend time with would feel like I am bragging about them, and I am not, I am simply celebrating my conquest, you see, you came, you saw... BUT I CONQUERED! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Moral: Feel free to thumb this down, my superpowers need to be contained, or else I will beep my way to an early grave! Girls, mwah... and you know, just dodge the kiss if you cant handle love personified, they arent homing nor anything... Should I ask my doctor if she has any medications that will help me wire down after uh... Multiple female company? HAHAHAHAAAAAAH!... The thought made me kinda sad, im better, now just to prove to my company here that I got balls of steel, I am gonna post this and let you judge me all you want! BECAUSE YOU CANT HAVE EM!

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THE ABILITY TO WRITE IN ALL CAPS

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The power to make a sound in the forest when nobody is around

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The ability to immediately gain stage four stomach cancer.

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the power to cancel your powers wich is the power thats cancelling powers.

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LIME

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The power to reproduce asexually.

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the power to see poorly during night time and considerably better during the day with the help of +5 glasses

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the power to be a regular person on supermans planet.

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the power to walk through unlocked doors

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The power to fly without leaving the ground.

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The power to understand that if you type or read at this section, then it is probably because it means something to you... Moral: That is almost a superpower... I mean wow pointless makes a point which is pointless, and a pointless point with a point is... anyway I just divided by infinite loop. Cant say that is far away from zero which by itself is basically a circle... Damn im good! (just for that final line im gonna get thumbed down, its worth it though.

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The power to differentiate between captal 'i's and lower case 'l's.

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the power to trip on shoe laces, even when they are not even your own.

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the power to steal 4 avocados in july at a supermarket at 9:37 am in your underpants without arms while a cop laughs at how stupid you look. plus while you do that a cute marshmallow comes and rapes your children.

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Writing "because moral man loves you" Moral: I am far too antisocial to love everyone, I mean the more love for me the better... so I can give a lot to my girlfriend too... love you baby! (my girlfriend duh) Moral 2: Someday ill tell her that I type this comments, and if you thumb this up, she will find out I declared my love here too... aww... love the man that does not love you... for love! Me: Huh? My head is spinning... and if yours is too, then thumb this comment up.

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The power to read minds. ...of those who went through brain death.

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The power to make a pointless superpower.

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The power to transform into Osama whenever someone sees you.

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The Power to make up full names on the spot.

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The power to Lee when your near a toilet

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The Power of being able to do anything but does not work when you need it

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!