The power to turn the inside of your mouth into solid brass so you can safely eat Cap'n Crunch

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The power to change the colour of your right index finger

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The power to shit rainbows but have incredible pain while shitting them.

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the power to summon a bus, but it will only come at the same time as another bus

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The power to be able to mate with squirrels and have offspring.

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The ability to pee freshly-made Japanese rice noodles.

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The power to eat anything, as long as it's food

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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The power to be immune to every third bullet.

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The power to finish homework that dosen't even get A's

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The power to ejaculate lazer beams...

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The power to perpetually yawn.

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To turn into a guy that is tiny but can't do anything but speak.

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The power to think of a witty comeback 3 days too late.

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The power to teleport to the center of the Earth.

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The power to write an essay and your teacher gives you a D or an E for trying to do your best, even though he/she talk about stuff we don't even care about

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The power to liquify yourself.

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the power to make the imaginary axix the best thinkers ever

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the power to run windows ME for a day without the system hanging

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The ability to feel pain 1,000 times more acutely than an average human.

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The power to generate fecal matter when being held at gunpoint.

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the power to hear any alvin and the chipmunks song you want, but only when you have a migraine

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The ability to have every pointless superpower then, now, and in the future.

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The power to have every single power you can imagine but not able to use any of them

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!