The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

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The power to laugh at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to cure cancer, but cause death by radiation poisoning.

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The power to breath while under a container of water

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The ability to teach someone how to blink.

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The ability to stretch your arm towards an object thats in a reachable distance then clench your hand around the object and pull it to yourself.

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The ability to not make a face when eating a lemon, but only after you have already eaten 5 lemons.

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The power to turn any department store into a Londis.

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The power to make sense of Donald Trump

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The power to teleport up to 35 feet once a year

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

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The power to post hundreds of pointless superpowers in minutes. Moral: It is always fun to see another person`s comment between mine with zero thumbs, while mine always keep the excellent two thumb quality! Lesser man would say thank you... I say you are welcome everybody ;) (A moral man original, because someone needs the balls of steel required to see things how they really are)

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The power to have every superpower ever (including pointless ones) for one second every full moon, then have every pointless one for the rest of the time.

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The power to attract flies everytime you're eating or on a date.

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The power to smell feces from a mile away.

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the power to see the present

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The power to turn into a 90 year old woman with 20+ diseases

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the power to hover 1 atom above the ground

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The power to poke

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The ability to eat whole chickens at will, but only when yr not hungry.

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The power to be invisible to bartenders.

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the power to remember th...

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The power to get shot when you're alone

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!