The power to chew with your tongue

The power to sing that lame "Tomorrow" song from Annie uncontrollaby on Dec. 21, 2012.

The ability to anticipate the release of half-life three. Sidenote: Goes hand in hand with the ability to bathe in your own tears.

the ability to make something that docent exists

The power to stop typing about the power. IT'S OVER 9000.

The power to finish anyone's sentience.

The power to realize that your personality is like a shithole.

The power

The ability to get a joke exactly ten minutes after every one else gets it

The power to glow very bright and emit a loud alarm everytime you're scared.

The power to smell your own feet without taking your shoes out.

The power to lick your own back...

The power to turn shades of brown or red, but only when exposed to the sun for an extended amount of time.

the power to walk on water with crocks. But only if there is enough people around to laugh at your fashion choices.

The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

The power to see you're self in a mirror

The power to teleport to the place of where you are

The ability to sit down without using any other body part than your butt.

The power to walk into Mordor.

The power to make all girls look pretty but only in your head and only if you drunk enough.

The power to only see things that are a shade of orange if the date adds up to a divisor of Pi x enough to make it a whole number, if you are wearing a hat and have recently expeled bodily fluid

The power to know the perfect rebuttal, but only after you've lost and nobody cares about what you were arguing about anymore.

The power to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide.

The power to wake up on time but still feel super-tired.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!