The power to turn into birdseed

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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the ability to make your finger nails longer by 0.1 %

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The power to switch your eyeballs with your testicles but you still see out your eyes and your testicles are leaking.

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The power to project a hologram, but only of yourself projecting another hologram.

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The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

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The power to make your feet stink at will.

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The ability to spit in random obscure crayola colors.

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The power to kiss your own elbow

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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lol

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The power to not have a superpower

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The power of walking on land

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the power to move up floors or levels,but only in an elevator

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The true motor of bliss runs on sex and ice cream with no flavor but calling august to see if life will eat us all or not. And she is. And he is. But the dance is corrupted with none-music and machin touch down there.....

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The ability to have every possible thought as fast as the Flash is capable of moving and faster and know how every scenario can, will, and most likely will play out, yet you cannot say anything about them and they cannot be put to use. As well as no one can read your mind or anything similar to obtain said knowledge.

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the power to cure someones cold by giving them AIDs

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The power of being Chuck Norris and be the main utterly pointless source of pointless powers.

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the power to turn apartly invisible

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The ability to bring statues to life but they can't move or talk

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The power of self mind control

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The power to rite liek dis

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the power to frow up when your not sick.

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The power to die on command

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!