The power of creating poop.

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The superpower of surviving a gunshot, if properly attended in a hospital afterwards.

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The power to teleport dead dogs 1 foot away from you once a month

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The power to only be physically attractive to blind people.

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the ability to lick your own crotch

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The power to see 3 seconds into the future.

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The power to find treasure, when you try to look for it.

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The power to teleport anywhere while on the toilet.

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The power to change the channel of the television every 2 hours.

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The ability to inhale carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen.

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The power to have Hiccup at will, but no being able to stop it at will.

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The power to be skillful at everything, but only when need to go to the toilet and you are on the verge of crapping yourself.

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The pointless super power of take a shit in your own mouth!

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The power to be extremely well-endowed while having sex, but only when masturbating

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The power to read your own mind.

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the power to sizzle like bacon

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The power to type on a key board. WAIT A MINUTE

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the power to have no one read this post

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The power of eating but only when you're dead

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The power to open a pickle jar in one try

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The ability to fly while in an airplane

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The power to realize that I am starting to sound (and type) more and more like Salvador Dali, and being proud because the man was a genius, the most fantastic thing he could do every morning, was to wake up with a person as fantastic as himself! And while he indeed walked a different path than most do, no one can deny his footprints are clearer than most... Perfection? A losers wish... to be outstanding... is a gift on its own. Moral: Yeah many of you see this as pointless, so I thought I could just as well add it. While I dream of the age where people stop looking for Gods and strengthen the most powerful tool in the universe: YOU.

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To see what you are currently doing from the same perspective of your regular vision, with the ability to understand that you're doing it. But not have the ability to stop yourself from doing what you were going to do as if you didn't have the power.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!