The power to have any power you want, but only if you are touching a nine pound diamond, standing in a pool of gold, and stabbing yourself in your pineal gland, the smallest muscle in your body.

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The power of bullet attraction.

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The power to be invisible to eligible singles.

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The power to chew ass and kick bubblegum, but be all out of ass!

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The power to kick ass and chew bubblegum but be all out of kicks. "sits down chews bubblegum"

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The power to blame it on the Boogie

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The power to teleport to any 3rd world country

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the power to vote

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The power to give this thumbs-up

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the power to photobomb random peoples photos without even knowing

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the power to live in lava, magma, fire, etc unless your body temp is over 120 degrees

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The power to be number one, unless someone was better than you.

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The power to shoot rainbows out of your dick, the rainbows can pwn anyone if you smoked crack before using this power

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The ability to turn invisible when no one is looking at you, when they look at you you become visible again

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the power to be alive but only when awake

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The ability to teleport less than 1 inch once a day

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The power to predict the present

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The power to be able to get a key for a door on that does not even exist every 6 weeks

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The power to know who farted at any time.

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The ability to feel all pain 30 seconds after it happens.

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the power to shit with your mouth

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The power to go your nose hair by 3 inches every 3 hours

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The power to freeze time but you would also be frozen. Basically dooming everyone to be frozen in time with no way of getting out. No one would even know about it but it will happen.

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!