- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to burn the sun.

instantaneously add any amount of weight to your body (but not be able to lose it)

the power to fly, only when in the cabin of an airplane

the ability to transport anywhere and into any situation, but you never know where

the power to jizz on cue

the power to poop pee

The power of temporary invincibility but you have to kill yourself first

The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

The ability to turn into any non-living object, but not back.

The ability to evolve into magickarp

The power to not look up silly websites on the internet

The power to fire lasers from my nipples.

The power to turn 12% invisible.

the ability to time travel 5 minutes into the past this power recharges every 5 minutes

The ability to forcibly break every bone in your body so you can shrink down never to regrow your bones back.

The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

The power to cause cash to spontaneously combust upon touch.

The power to lift animate objects in the same direction.

The power to make people laugh telling german jokes.

The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

Laser pointer vision.

The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

The ability to laugh listening to Trololo

The power to have a power.

Pointless Super Powers