The power to look super sexy, but only in pitch black darkness.

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The power to spontaneously break into song only during absolutely tragic moments.

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The power to kill any conversation you have.

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THe power to be able to walk through unlocked doors.

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The power to strap wheels of cheese to your own body without getting tired easily.

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the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

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The power to fart flames

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The power to die whenever you want.

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The power to turn your current clothes inivisible

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The power to heal yourself when your not hurt

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The power to be Chuck Norris's bitch.

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The power to become any animal, but you have to be touching that animal to transform and it can only be a rat.

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The power to still have 0.01 percent of germs on your hands.

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The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

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The power to go Skiing and ice skating in mid summer

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The power to open doors with your bare hands

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The power to be able to run at the speed of light only when you have no energy to stand up

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the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

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The power to be Chuck Norris

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The power to see through water

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The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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the power to fly if you are touching the ground

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The power to vote for Hillary Clinton and be happy with the decision that you made.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!