The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

The power to pick something up and stay the same but smell bad.

The ability to blow strawberries

The power to be immune to everything except for bears, beets, and Battlestar Galactica

The power to eat air with your lungs

The power to know what something looks like, bu only if you have seen it before

The power to automatically register soda caps online, but only if it's Diet.

The power to see Waldo everywhere you look, unless your looking at his books

The power to fall off a tree, then land in spikes.

The ability to handle the truth.

The power to look at yourself in third person

The power to have a massive nob on your forehead and to attempt to have sex with anything with more then one lump on its chest :D

The power to jerk off without using your hands

the ability to walk half through a brick wall

to power to do the bird is the word

The power to be a dick.

ability to pee when around a bathroom

the power to toast bread without a toaster

The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

the power to smack the hair off someones head.

the power to commit suicide when you are about to die

The ability to forget what your saying every 3 seco- what was I saying again?

The power to sneeze out of your mouth and cough out of your nose.

The power to make dad jokes.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!