The power to eat broken glass and shit windows.

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The power to slow down time while you are at school

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The power of x-ray vision only when you are naked in public. More people the stronger it is.

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The power to touch someone's face while watching rain burn.

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the ability to change the color of one eye if dehydrated nearly to the point of death

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The power to peel a banana with your foreskin

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The power to fall asleep whenever you want to

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The power to transform any food into shit simply by eating it.

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The power to type: Hey if you wanna read funny "superpewers", then you have come to the right place! Just follow the trail of The moral man so he can stay in the middle the place where nobody looks or gives a sh... you know what? Dont thumb me, Moral man wants to stay down here rather than stuck in the middle of nowhere. Moral: If telling people to read more pointless superpowers at the "newest" superpowers, isnt pointless, then that would mean that this whole "pointless superpowers section is really meaningful... which by itself is meaningless... WIN!

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you can talk to dust but they dont respond in a language you can understand

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Asexual reproduction.

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The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

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the power to walk halfway through a wall

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the power to regenerate but only if your not hurt in any way

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the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

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The power to sing but your mute

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the power to predict the future 3 minutes later.

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The power to have every type of phobia in existence.

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The ability to be raped.

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The power to go Skiing and ice skating in mid summer

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The power to be buried at sea

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the power to create your own real working money but you cannot spend it

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the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!