The power to have every type of phobia in existence.

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The power to turn a dollar into three quarters.

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The power to make dogs quit sniffing you.

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The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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To be able to kill a Yak from 47 yards. No more, No less.

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The power to make everyone you touch see nothing but porn

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The power to speak Spanish, but only to people who do not speak Spanish.

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Power to vomit violently during royal weddings.

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The power to shit rainbows but have incredible pain while shitting them.

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The power to explode or fly at mach 10, but those powers can activate involuntarily, without warning

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The power to have morning sickness in the evening.

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the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

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The power to make any woman have volcanic earth.shattering orgasms but only if she's having sex with another man

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The power to swim on land

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The power to spell backwards.

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The power to understand animals but only extinct animals

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The power to levitate birds while they are flying....

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The power to never drop something, as long as it is touching the ground. - JC

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The power of love

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The Power to think of a better superpower you could have chosen

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The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...

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The power to be white but only in the city limits of detroit or compton.

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The power to look what is at the back of your head.

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The ability to be the newest post until someone else posts.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!