The power to expand the size of your head and gain weak telekinesis, but you die in 3 days, the bigger you make your head, the more powerful your telekinesis but the faster you die.

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The ability to know the current mood of your doppleganger.

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The power to travel faster than the speed of light but never slower than the speed of light.

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The power to sing better then anyone in the world, but only in the presence of the deaf.

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The power to go back in time to when you were in Kindergarten for the soul purpose of eating the crayons before anyone else.

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The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

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The power to sleep

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The power to shoot socks out of your hands.

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The ability of using their one true super power with stunning accuracy.

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to travel in time....2 minutes in the past exactly after..masturbation.... masturbation-time-loop...........

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The power to make fish appear in pants.

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The power to give vegetables immortality.

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The power to get older every second

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Power to turn your liver invisible.

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the power to imagine everybody with underpants while your nervous but it only happens in your dreams

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The ability to have a gigantic erection, but only when a gay man is fantisizing about you

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The power to shoot 1 watt of lightning form your hands

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The power to create ice out of thin air but only at -35 degree celcius and below.

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The power to vote in a communist state.

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The power to hear morse code.

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The power to go back to Anti-jokes.

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To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

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the power to always do your homework but never turn it in to the teacher.... RESULTS=failure

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The power to kick ass and chew bubblegum but be all out of kicks. "sits down chews bubblegum"

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!