The power to turn cake into poop.

The power to shoot yogurt from your armpits once a month

The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

The power to look like another person, but only if the other person is uglier

The power to bring life to nobody, except Winston Chrurchil.

THE POWER OF AUTISM !!!

The power to write fast but only when your hungry

The power to be immortal, but only whilst dead.

All of aquaman's powers.

The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

The power to survive a car crash only if it's between 9 and 9.30 am.

the power to jerk off

The ability to creat the worlds best computer but only if it doesnt work

The power to never be hungry for five minutes after you eat.

The power to make cheeseburgers only when your tummy is full.

The ability to access any website you want but, you cant connection to the internet.

the power to have a baby,but have to give it away after three days. WARNING:MAY cause death,exploding,and blindness.

The power to stretch your tounge but it can only curve in a way that it only get inside your anus.

The power to get a boner when you're horny.

The power to take a pill without drinking anything.

for every time you get emotionally hurt part of you body actually decompose and die.

The ability to not be able to say you have an ability

The power to see John Cena, but only when he taps out/gives up.

the ability to drink coffee without burning your tongue.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!