The power to jump 1 inch higher.

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The power to not remember, the only problem, is that you don't remember having this awesome power.

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The power to eat pop-tarts as soon as they pop out of the toaster

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The power to punch that like button

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to pronounce the word "rural."

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The super power to shine in daylight

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The power to shape-shift only into a human

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The power to die on the spot and not revive

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the power to feel pain whenever you breathe

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cry acid tears

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the power to turn a care package on black ops from dogs to ammo

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The ability to mess up a Rubix Cube with your mind

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the power to turn into a rock and you cant turn back into a human

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The ability to make food disappear from a plate by putting it in your body.

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Being only half invisible.

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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The power to shoot a any amount of milk out of your belly button every July 4th at 2 o'clock

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The power to be blind

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The power to jump several thousand feet in the air, without the power to survive the impact of landing

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the power to sing like an angel... but only if the song is "friday" or "baby"

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The power to Punch holes in Mountains, Only Mountains and nothing else.

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The power to fly really fast, but only in one direction (down).

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The power to teleport anywhere while on the toilet.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!