to create balloons out of anywhere on your body, and twist them into whatever you look at.

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the power to take a poo everywhere but on the toilet

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The power to resurrect dead insects

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The power to sit for extended periods of time in front of the computer doing pointless things. The person who is reading this has that pointless superpower otherwise he would be doing something productive.

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power to transform into a dick with legs

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The power of superman while never being able to leave Krypton.

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The ability to to die whenever you want. RIP

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The power to see the future five days after it has happend

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The power to see through walls, but only when you're in a glass room.

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The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

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The power to surround yourself in fire, but only when you're underwater.

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to see in the dark, but only when the lights are on.

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The power to crash land ANY vehicle you steer/control. "Hah finally I got a tank! OMG ITS GAINING SPEED ON ITS OWN IN FRONT OF THAT GIANT RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP!

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The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

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The power to fly, but only when you touch the ground.

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The power to not get shit d*ck

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The ability to rectify health and safety concerns, using a sword.

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The power to kill you self.

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The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

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T3h p0w@ T0 b3 L33T

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The ability to count to potato

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The power of having two left hands.

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The power to make Dylan Zona trip on everything when he walks and falls face first I to a pile of shit

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!