The power to become a virgin but only if you've never had sex.

Super strength that works for a millisecond.

power to transform into a dick with legs

Really bendy thumbs.

the power to say i can bend you

The power to identify a senior citizen by looking at their naked butt.

The power to inhale coins without dying.

The power to control people minds, but in the world only remains a few blonds and you.

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

The power to be french.

The ability to fly while on a plane. You can only do this at the same altitude and speed of the plane.

the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

The power to cum out of your finger tips

The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

The power to not get a boner when seeing a hot girl.

The power to learn anything very quickly but to forget all knowledge of what you've learnt 3 seconds later.

The power to rain fireballs down upon those you love.

The power to sweat profusely on cold days.

The power to turn into a 90 year old woman with 20+ diseases

To fly.. into the zone.."Friend zone"

ability to say a new letter anywone can say that

The ability to transform in to a glass of water

The power to teleport yourself to the nearest exit location.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!