The power to be so fast, that if you sprint forward you travel the whole world just in time to fuck yourself.

The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

The ability to talk to dust mites.

you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

The power to not do it.

The power to turn everything one touches with one's hand into skittles, but only applying to amputees.

The power to beat up anyone but only if u sneeze first

The Power of your footstep sounding like a horse gallop

to be able to fly but only 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000001 millimetres of the ground and not even feel or look like your floating

The ability to teleport out of danger randomly, whenever you do you are handcuff at the hands and ancles naked. You also don't get to choose where you end up.

The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

The power to have night vision when there's daylight.

The power to turn into a cat while a dog is watching you.

The power to convert Oxygen into chemical energy and waste gases.

the power to read your own mind the power of 75% levitation the power of turning into a juicy pork chop in the presence of a lion the power to believe it is butter the power to turn into a blender once and never change back the power to cry acid the power of turning highly visable while trying to sneak the power to speak, sneeze and cough really loudly and annoyingly the power to teleport half of your body the power to age extremely fast the power to have the patience to write this the power to read all of these d pwer 2 rite stupeedlee the power to thumbs down this (it also makes you look stupid) the power to only speek in sarcasm the power to see the past (not the future) emit eht lla sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop eht

The ability to think the thought you thought of is the same thought as another persons thought while thinking of that thought.

The power to, receive THE POWER! What is this power you may ask... it is the power of TRUE POWER!

The ability to have udders for nipples.

The power to see the past. Only the past. Never the present.

The power to drown on land.

The power to do back flips whenever you want to but only in your mind.

The power to quote memes randomly

The power to misspell when tyring to spell qukcily

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!