- Pointless Super Powers

The ability to go forward in time at will.

The power to permanently shorten your own penis

The ability to change Celsius to Farenheit.

the power to make food shrimp.

The power to climb trees really fast, but they shrink when you do.

The power to time travel two seconds into the future.

The power to telepathically fold paper.

The power to be great at math but forget how to breathe.

The power to think of epic jokes but only at funerals

the superpower of making pointless and lame jokes for which no human laughs (except crazy ones and apes)

The power to think about thinking about having the power to be stupid

The power to change different colours depending on you feel.

The epic power of laser pointer vision.

The power to think of pointless powers.

The superpower to get your comment in the tops because you mistyped "the pewer to type backwards" backwards. Its a funny story actually, you people liked it so much that it skyrocketed past the correctly spelled ones and turned out top.. 40 or something? I am being modest here... just go into the popular sections and take a look. I would have told you it was me who wrote that super pewer but you would not really believe me would you? By the way thanks, it made me laugh, and I hope that is the same reason you thumbed it up, you people are awesome! Moral: It was me. (I mistyped the word mistyped itself which is grammatically incorrect by itself, now beam me up Scotty!)

The power to jump over any fence no matter how high! Good luck surviving the fall.

The ability to lift things up and put them down.

That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

The ability to turn anything into a belt.

The Ability to make everybody hate YOU!

Every time you clap some one dies

The power to elect George W Bush.

power to have no power at all

The ability to be in fashion.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!