The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The power to state the obvious at will.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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The power of tasting irresistibly delishush whenever anyone gets hungry.

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The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

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The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

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The power to teleport to anywhere in the known universe, but not be able to teleport back

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sdrawkcab gnipyt ta dab eb tub sdrawkcab daer ot rewop eht

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The power of turning into a crushed can right after you got into a car accident.

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the power to travel around the world in 24 hours

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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the power to fail at life

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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The power to vomit pizza and root beer chunks at will.

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The power to, receive THE POWER! What is this power you may ask... it is the power of TRUE POWER!

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The power to live forever until you die a natural way or get killed.

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The power.

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The power to read someones mind.... After they have spoken what's on their mind.

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The ability to face reality after reading all the pointless powers

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The power to see in only one random color everyday.

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The power to see through anything except air.

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The power to make pencils dull.

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The power to throw fireballs only under water

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!