The power to shrink your private parts.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The power to fell pain 3 minutes after it happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to write about pointless superpowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to make clean socks dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to disintegrate yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to see through glass walls.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

The power to see through glass

thumb_up thumb_down +72

The power to freeze time, but not unfreeze it.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

The power to read upside down...only when you're upside down.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power throw up hockey pucks every few minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

?u?op ?p?sdn ????? o? ???od ???

thumb_up thumb_down +60

the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

thumb_up thumb_down +60

The ability to swim in water.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

thumb_up thumb_down +54

The abilitie to tell whether or not the light on a fridge is on or off...

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

thumb_up thumb_down +48

the power to feel pain whenever you breathe

thumb_up thumb_down +46

The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

thumb_up thumb_down +145

The power to have an ability.

thumb_up thumb_down +143

A man with the power to make sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +139

The power to live forever until you die a natural way or get killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +137

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!