The power to have anything you want that is free.

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The power to sense when infomercials will be on hours before they broadcast.

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The power to think of words that rhyme with orange.

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The power to yawn with your mouth closed

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to be able to eat any type of food, even indian food and then poop it out the next day

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Delayed Reaction Man

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The ability to innoculate against all non-existent diseases

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The power to turn cheese into potatoes.

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The ability to perfectly recall the and only the third digit in a series of numbers.

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thw power to not feel anything during sex unless you dont like the sex (ie rape, ugly fat pearson)

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The power to become encased in concrete at will.

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The power to use the english language to grammatical perfection. er, ferpection.

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The ability to read the recaptcha images

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the ability to glow in the light.

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The power to see five times as clearly and up close, only when looking at insects and arachnids.

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The power to fly but fall when floating above the ground.

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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the ability to blow yourself

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The power to fart rainbows

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The power to have ABSOLUTELY anything you want!... ...As long as that absolutely anything you want happens to be a pile of premium fresh horsecrap... Moral: This made myself lol, so it probably has 16 red thumbs by now YAY!!!!!!!!

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The power to secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes every time you secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes.

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The power to let 100 cockroaches crawl upon you for everytime you display emotion

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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The ability to sweat poop.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!