The power to to do everything a normal human can do.

The power to scratch your head 1% faster than usual, if it doesn't itch.

The power to sweat profusely on cold days.

The power to read this text unless you can see it.

The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

the power the convince people if they agree

the ability to summon a jar of marmalade the forces people to commit adultery

The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

The power to type random pointless powers on a website for pointless powers.

The power to pull any woman that just asked you for a shag.

Being alive (until you die).

The power to Silence everyone when they're saying anything

The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

The power to turn a boomerang into a doggy toy

The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

to make your bowel work backwards

The power to climb up fallen trees

The power to walk 1% faster.

The power to produce up to 20 gummy bears at once through the process of budding

The power to remove cancer from stroke victim's bodies.

The power to expel a single spaghetti from any limb randomly

The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

The power to walk through air.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!