- Pointless Super Powers

The power to shape shift, but only into yourself two inches taller.

The power to freeze laptops when you're watching porn and someone comes in.

The super power of randomly confuse the feeling of being about to sneeze and being about to shit yourself

Delayed Reaction Man

I got rhe power to always respawn in the middle of a noob tube. it's a blast...

The power to have horrible spelling while trying to write an ad for the pointless superpowers app.

the power to nap instantly, but only when you're tired.

The power to read your own mind!

The power to bypass capcha codes

By the power of GREYSKULL! The color of my skull is grey.

The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

the power of not being able to feel pain during constipation

The power to smell whore

The ability to judge a book by its cover.

The power to control mealworms

the power to give yourself sunburn

The power to always find lost objects... right after buying a replacement.

The power to make a Stegosaurus appear when you make a time-machine!

The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

The power to shit out toilet paper.

The power to cure cancer, but only on corpses

The power to realize that I am starting to sound (and type) more and more like Salvador Dali, and being proud because the man was a genius, the most fantastic thing he could do every morning, was to wake up with a person as fantastic as himself! And while he indeed walked a different path than most do, no one can deny his footprints are clearer than most... Perfection? A losers wish... to be outstanding... is a gift on its own. Moral: Yeah many of you see this as pointless, so I thought I could just as well add it. While I dream of the age where people stop looking for Gods and strengthen the most powerful tool in the universe: YOU.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!