The power to think this exact sentence at the worst possible time.

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power to transform into a dick with legs

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The power to a nokia phone.

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The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

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The ability to cross the Do Not Cross tape at crime scenes

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The power to make awesome school lunch for the kids!

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The power to fly in tornadoes

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The power to be the only homosexual in a house of 5 other people who are there for sex.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

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The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

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The power to pronounce the word "rural."

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The power to poop in the worst time ever and you cannot control it

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The power to wake up one second earlier than everyone else.

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the power to get sick

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The power to make police pull over the black guy next to you (in your car) and anytime this happens you get the ticket not him

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the ability to know if a video game sucks just by looking at the name

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The power to write pointless superpowers

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The ability to rectify health and safety concerns, using a sword.

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The power to sh*t bricks

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The power of confusing the word "your" for "you're", or vice versa.

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the power to say i can bend you

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The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

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Brazilian waxing via telepathy.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!