- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to stop masturbating every day

The power of becoming sick when you need it.

The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

The power to eat the booty like a poor person's groceries

The power to turn into a magikarp

The power to finish anyone's sentience.

The power to handle the truth. Moral: Because with the exception of a few good men... YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

The power to eat junk food at light speed

The power to make clean socks dirty.

The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

The power to be gangsta, only in front of true gangsta's.

The power to state the obvious at will.

The power to have a device to turn the tv off without touching it!!! :O

the power to sleep while standing!

The power to peel a banana with your foreskin

The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

the powers to be a fat gassy woman

The power to do anything you want, but only when you are sleeping

The power to turn a brainfart into a fart

to poop a penny every year

The power to see the past. Only the past. Never the present.

The power to know when your sandwitch will be ready!

The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

Pointless Super Powers