The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

The power to use the internet whenever you want, but only on dialup

the power to twerk as good as miley cyrus

The power to do something when you do it.

Will i tell you the joke about the butter? Aww no you'll only spread it!

The power to have an ejaculate in your pants by looking a girl in the eyes.

The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

the power to live forever but you'll die if you don't eat 100 coach roaches a week

the power to say i can bend you

The power to get the most rated pointless superpowers post

The power to develop a cancerous tumor anywhere in your body at any time you want.

the power to be extremely guilty in the bum.

The power to be able to stop the world for two seconds only every 2 years.

The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

The power to kill yourself.

The power of super strength but only in your left pinky toe - EO

the power to suck but only when your awesome

The power to see in the dark while exposed to sunlight.

the power to fly twice every 22 years for 6 seconds in you room with the door closed

The power to....um.... shit I forgot That's Wat u get for wanting the power of amnesia

The power to teleport the remote control to you from across the room twithout getting up, but only if your TV is broken.

Invisibility, but only in the dark.

To shit bricks.

The power to jizz in your pants when you eat a grape.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!