The power to turn back the clock at will. Not time, just clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

The ability to ingest Dihydrogen-monoxide and survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The ability to see through insects.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

thumb_up thumb_down +96

The power to ride a unicorn without a horn that can't fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

Reversed telepathy, everyone can hear your thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +94

The power to automatically yell every action you do like in a Japanese fighting game, I once started doing this for fun, at the end of the day eveyone hated me, good luck. (OPEN DOOR! OPEN DOOR! CLOSE DOOR! POOL SHOT! CUMMING HARD CUMMING HARD! SONIC BOOM! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! TAKING A PUNCH TO THE FACE UPPERCUT!)

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to Insult people by accidentally saying something you didn't know was offensive to them. You adopted jew

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to float in water, and then sink sometimes.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The power to play Call of Duty for free, if you've already bought the game not for free.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to excel at something that nobody cares about.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to feel like you're gonna sneeze forever

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to stop time whenever you get stabbed in the liver

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The ability to unknowingly untaim domestic animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The ability to turn on lamps through doors when it's bright.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to fly.......but only in your underwear.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Invisibility when people aren't looking.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

the power to explain accidents when nobody gives a rats ass anymore

thumb_up thumb_down +28

the ability to produce petrol from your ankles but only when you're on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down

The power to eat nails and crap broken glass.

thumb_up thumb_down +137

The power of hearing peoples conversations but only on topics related to Shrek.

thumb_up thumb_down +123

To be ALMOST able to run faster than a speeding bullet

thumb_up thumb_down +119

The power to have diarrhea at any time

thumb_up thumb_down +119

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

thumb_up thumb_down +117

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!