The ability to teleport 1 step forward at will at a walking pace.

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the ability to type slower.

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The power to look at yourself in third person

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The power to be able to never have a power.

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Nothing to see here, keep moving...

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The power to summon garden mushrooms in the top of your head every time you're having a serious talk to anyone

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The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

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The power to make sweet love to your mother just by caressing her between the legs for a while.

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The power to talk in any language but you can't talk in the language of the country that you're in.

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The ability to see through womens clothes....but only if they weigh over 300 pounds.

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The power to Punch holes in Mountains, Only Mountains and nothing else.

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The power to turn invisible but only when no ones around

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You can send your mind and memories into your past self, but it doesn't work if you have any regrets or want to do things better.

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The power to chuck dead babies from a bridge

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The power to have incredible strength, in the bathroom.

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The power to smell any point in time

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The power to know exactly how events would have turned out, had the last event gone differently

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The ability to understand math but cannot apply it to ANYTHING.

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the power to hovertate

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The power to turn cheese into potatoes.

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The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...

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the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

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The power to control dodos

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the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!