The superpower to read a 2 pages of a book at once. Never mind... This is the BEST superpower in the world! [Insert troll face here]

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The power to turn into a pebble

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The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

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you can get lots of pussy, but their all severed

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The ability to ingest Dihydrogen-monoxide and survive.

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the power to run 10000 mph, but evertime you ran you were teleported to a police station and you turned into a black guy

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The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

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the power to get married

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The power to transform into a vegetable, but only one way

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The power to die when you get scared.

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the power to grow taller whenever there is a low beam ahead of you.

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the power to finally find your way out of a revolving door.

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The power to smell poo...

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The ability to push doors marked "pull"

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The power to teleport in the bottom of the sea.

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The ability to turn invisible but only when no one is looking at you

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Stop clapping

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The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

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Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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The power to die at will

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The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

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The power to turn Dollars into Pennies

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The power of being able to see 1 day into the past

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The power to know the end of every movie ever.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!