- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to always be at half mast.

The power to talk really loud or quiet and you can control it.

The ability to read braile.

The ability to make someone's heart stop, but only after they have died on their own of natural causes

The power to turn into an exploding pink chair.

The power to telepathically open umbrellas, only open and only umbrellas.

The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

The power to think outside the bun.

the power to shrink or grow at will, except your organs stay the same size

The power to find pokemon attractive

The power to fly 2mm above the ground

The power to communicate with sperm.

the power to self destruct without hurting people.

The power to eat sandwiches and never get full

the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

The power to shit diamonds, but only into magical underwear that turn diamonds into shit.

being able to change shape whist flying "It's a bird!, no it's a plane , It's a flying Sammich!?!

The power to have any girl as your girl friend but they turn ugly

The power to vomit through your anus.

The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

The power to know you don't have a superpower

The ability to fly, but only when there's no gravity.

the power to do two suicide bombings

Pointless Super Powers