The power to be able to be a guy who can create and control fire but if it touches you, you still burn

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The power to turn computers into pencil sharpeners.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The power to block your own powers

thumb_up thumb_down -1

the power to travel through time... at the speed of normal time.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

the power to finish an all you can eat

thumb_up thumb_down -3

the power to kill plants in a desert.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The power to be invincible to every thing but fire water tornadoes bullets explosions guns knifes blades swords grenades sticks pointy objects disease infections sicknesses flu illness natural disasters accidents vehicles trucks electricity meteors bombs rockets drug addiction peer pressure starvation tiredness torture pain monkeys radiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The powers of findinf Waldo everywhere but in his books

thumb_up thumb_down -3

the power to think like a sumo wrestler between 2:30 and 3:30 am on thursdays

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The ability to replace your DNA with parmesan cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The power of telekinesis over any object one is physically touching.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The power to be a walrus

thumb_up thumb_down -7

the power to shoot a powerful red laser beam everytime you open your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The Pickle Touch- That is, the power to pickle any object by merely touching it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

the power to feel the emotions of other people, that are severely depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The power to unsee the unseen.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Meatvision.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The ability to fly, only when you are asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

To call me maybe

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The power to make any liquid luke warm (it works both ways)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The power to survive at absolute zero

thumb_up thumb_down -15

the power to sleep through a prison rape

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The ability to piss lightning and be able to make people dance by wiggling your monobrow

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!