The power to choose the next president of the united states of america.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

the power to copy super powers but no one has super powers

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The power to look angry when not trying too and everyone else notices it and im just lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

The power to die when you use the letter e.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

the power to win any shit eating contest.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

The power to paralyze yourself from the waist-up.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

The pointless superpower to make any situation awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down +163

The power to take control of mentally disabled turtles.

thumb_up thumb_down +153

spontaneous ejaculation

thumb_up thumb_down +149

The power to summon earthworms

thumb_up thumb_down +145

The ability to pass gas and have it smell like coffee from Starbucks.

thumb_up thumb_down +133

solar powered night-vision

thumb_up thumb_down +125

The ability to be jokingly racist and not get sued by an hypocritically racist black man and end up having to carry out a minor jail sentence or pay a fine.

thumb_up thumb_down +117

The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to not be able to get powers

thumb_up thumb_down +101

xray vision , but you must close your eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to attract bullets.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The power to eat anything that is from a plant

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The ability to smell with your hands

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The power to teleport anywhere at the cost of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

Having the ability to drink bleach and not die. You only get really sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power to make poorly drawn art in less time than it takes to blink.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

thumb_up thumb_down +67

the power to see through cereal box to see if there is a prize inside it.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!