The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

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The power to be able to insult that piece of shit Chuck Norris without bein... YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! *dead* And of course the ability to type you`re death scream and you`re status after you`re dead.

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The power to develop a cancerous tumor anywhere in your body at any time you want.

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The power to quit smoking 5 times in a week.

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The power to run faster that a chetah when asleep, but to move as fast a snail when awake.

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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the power to write amazingly neat but only with invisible ink

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The power to attract bullets

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The ability to fully regenerate... your eyebrows.

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the power to use "YOLO" as an excuse to do retarded things

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power to have time to actually wright something funny in pointless superpowers

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The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

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The power to tell when someone is using a cheese grater within 5 feet

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The power to withstand Justin Bieber's music.

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The ability to look at yourself in anything, except a mirror.

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The power to die on command

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The power to make up a pointless superpower because you are to lazy to make up a good one

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The power to open any door with no lock on it.

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The power to sweat acid.

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Being able to shapeshift into a grandpa then not being able to turn back until next year

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The power to walk forward and walk backwards at the same time in a lying down position while your asleep having a wet dream about goat puppies.

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the power to be able to shoot death lazers but only at people you want alive

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The power to turn into a mouse when in full view of a hawk.

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The power to hypnotize chickens

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!