The power to have sex with anyone, but only if they are older than 65

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The power to poop kittens with mittens

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The power to possess every pointless superpower and be tasked with saving the world.

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The power to see though Kashmir when people are around no wait that would be a good

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the power to be allergic to every thing

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The power to instantly faceplant when jumping

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the power to think like a sumo wrestler between 2:30 and 3:30 am on thursdays

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The power to read the minds of rocks

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The power to eat turkey with nothing more than your mouth.

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the power to read whenever somebody is about to make a pun but only if youve already heard that pun

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to not care about pointless superpowers

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the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

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The power to be born.

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The power to walk on water. But only when it's less than an inch deep.

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the power to cook instant pasta in less than 1 min.

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The power to go back in time and kill Hitlerr, only after you've had sex with him though

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The power to shit a blue agressive monkey.

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The power of turning on the lights without touching the switch but only when its daytime

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The power to pee glass shards, but it still hurts.

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to make water turn blue when you touch it.

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the ability to fly under water unless your wet

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The power to resist trolling.

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The Power To Poop on Command.

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The power to kill yourself at will

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!