The ability to perpetually masturbate.

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The power to climb up fallen trees

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The power to explode or fly at mach 10, but those powers can activate involuntarily, without warning

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Telekinetic power over styrofoam

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The power to see through windows

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The power to grow your toenails, but only one at a time.

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The power to answer trivia questions, but only being able to do so in a loud, aggressive voice.

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The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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the power to sneeze whenever you want

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The power to never get drunk

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The ability to fly, time-travel, be invisible, move at an incredible speed without wasting any energy, jump to incredible lengths, super-strength, handsomeness, charisma, and the ability to charm any woman on earth. If you bathe in radioactive liquid.

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The power to strap a bomb on your chest, walk into a crowded area, and detonate it

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The power to have to eat every 1 second.

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the power to increase the price of houses but only those you want to buy!

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the power to turn a care package on black ops from dogs to ammo

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Immunity to everything, except diseases that cause death.

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the ability to only eat chocolate in months that do not have an "r" in them.

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The ability to telepathically talk to people, but its sent in Morse code in dog whistle so human's can't hear it

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The power to stop time but if you do so you will also stop.

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the power to shit cellulose

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your balls glow in the dark 6am every day

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the power to do 1,000,000 pushups but you cant record it or show anyone

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The power of always having small, thin clothes in the winter.

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The power to predict last week's lottery numbers

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!