A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to fly, but only when pigs do

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The power to read books really quickly but forget what you just read.

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The power to move 1 minute forward in time every 60 seconds.

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The power to turn gold into stones.

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The power to make any girl attracted to you. Unless the girl is anywhere above a 7 on the hot scale

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The power to make dead batteries appear.

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The power to obtain money, by going to work

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Smell chick peas from over two miles away

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The power to swallow thousand liters of sperm without any ill effects.

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The power to see 147 billion years into the future.

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the power to go thru time by just seeing a watch when your going back where you started.

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The power to levitate 0.000000000000001mm off the ground when going up stairs.

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The power to hear in the dark.

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The power of being able to fly, but only on February 30th.

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The power to smell anything you look at, but you can't turn it off.

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the power to die 10 minutes after reading this comment

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The power to eat a core of a pineapple.

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The power to change you`re mind at rando... the power to... hmm.. the... the.. AH! The power to... hmm... no... hmm...

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The power to realize that the alphabet does not need to be in any particular order

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The power to foresee events, one yoctosecond before it happens

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The ability to see everything in shades of green

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The power to mind control inanimate objects.

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The power to find lost socks.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!