The ability to digest three types of earth elementals

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the power to fail at life

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The power to not get shit dick

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The power to teleport homeless people to the sun

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The ability to see through closed empty boxes.

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the power to shrink or grow at will, except your organs stay the same size

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power to eat 500000 big macs in a day

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The power to have anything in the world you will never ever need in your life

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The power to communicate with sperm.

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The power to eat food, unless you're touching food.

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The power to see correctly with wearing glasses

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the power to go slower than a snail :l

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The power to teleport through open doors.

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The power to make you`re penis really long! Like 500 meters long, and not being able to make it short(er) again.

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The power to vomit every time you burp.

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The power to elect George W Bush.

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The power to have a pointless power.

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The power to turn water into wine.

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The ability to police irony

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The SuperPower To Have No SuperPowers

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Having a bullet-proof skeleton.

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The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

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The power to say WACKY WAVING INFLATABLE ARM FLAILING TUBE MAN - but only at peoples funerals or when taking a piss (but you uncontrolably flail your arms).

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The power to grow your own armpit hair at a rate of 1 ft/day, and change its color at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!