The power to put up with your in-laws.

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the power to sneeze cum

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The power to have any pointless power you want

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the ability to walk half through a brick wall

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the ability to only crap while on a toilet

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The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

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The power to breath under water but only if you're holding your breath

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The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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the power to turn food into shit

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The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

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The ability to be jokingly racist and not get sued by an hypocritically racist black man and end up having to carry out a minor jail sentence or pay a fine.

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The power to be skillful at everything but only while asleep.

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The power to produce 5 times the normal amount of ball sweat.

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the power to suck at absolutly everything you do, except at failing.

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1.The power to run super fast but you have no legs. 2. The power to turn into a girl but you cannot change back like ever.

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The power to change your eye color.

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The power to fly..........Delta Airlines.

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The power to jizz mango chutney

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The Power to breath while under a cup of water

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The power to think your dreams are real.

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the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

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the power to orgasm with your mind

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The power to be more human than most people.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!