The power to never be burned, but only when underwater.

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The power to release the bogus

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The power to piss lemon juice

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X-ray vision that only works on windows

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The power to smell water.

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Smell chick peas from over two miles away

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The power to instantly ressurect at the very same spot if you get submerged under lava or acid.

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The power to grow giant, sharp and needly painful dildoes out of any surface just by sitting on it.

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the power to fire your bellybutton lint out of your navel at a speed of 3 miles per hour.

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The power to make awesome school lunch for the kids!

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The power to use your dick/tits as your cellphone at any time.

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The ability to see the future but only when you are in the past.

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The power to worsen your own eyesight at will.

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the ability to be a vampire on a stick

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The power to transform your appearance so that you look unmistakably like yourself.

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the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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The power to give yourself a migraine at will.

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The power to use expired coupons, this Power expired 3 years ago

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The power to feel lustful when watching My Little Pony Clopfic.

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the power to say the power to say the power to say the power to say.....

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Permanent superspeed - The ability to move faster than a speeding bullet, but you can't stop moving at that speed.

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Guys, it's over.

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the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!