The ability to make your tongue glow but only if your mouth is closed.

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The power to have the money to buy anything in the world, however you only have enough money to pay for the price of the object and not the taxes.

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The power to uncontrollably laugh and point at every black guy you see

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The power to crash land ANY vehicle you steer/control. "Hah finally I got a tank! OMG ITS GAINING SPEED ON ITS OWN IN FRONT OF THAT GIANT RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP!

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The power to go to sleep for 7 hours a day

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The power to pee out blood at will

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The ability to be 16 and sing like a woman and only have 10 year old girls like you

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the ability to fly 5 centimeters above ground

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The power to talk to animals. Especially when you tell your friend to dress like one.

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The power to uncontrollably dance to disco music

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The ability to control yourself while sleepwalking, but only when you're awake

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the power to tolerate alex simpson

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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Super taste, while living in Mexico.

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The power to turn water into wine.

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The ability to predict what will appear on ReCaptcha, SOLVEmedia, and all that stuff, before you see it.

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The power to have as much fun typing these as me. Moral: Of course you possess no such "useless" superpower you sad loser!

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The power to fly upwards at Mach 3 speeds, indoors

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The power of being pointless

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The power to become famous on vine

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The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

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The power to laugh when you tickle your feet

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The power to comment on Facebook with a pencil.

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The power to shit without squinting.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!