The power to die and get away with it

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The power to jump really high but get hurt when you fall back down :You now posses airborne suicide DUMBASS

thumb_up thumb_down

the power to not watch south park

thumb_up thumb_down -16

the power to masturbate just one time a day

thumb_up thumb_down -34

The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

thumb_up thumb_down -64

The power to exude spaghetti from your pockets, which is never stopped. The spaghetti keeps coming. Out of your pockets. Spaghetti everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

tree powers (the power to turn into a tree)

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to come back to life but only after u die

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The power to bleed an unlimited amount of blood, but on in front of deadly animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The ability to fly, but only during thunderstorms.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The power to write about power.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The power to return my ps4 for the third time, and wait for months to get a new one only to discover its the tv connection which is broken and I cant afford a new tv because I already spent a lot of money on ps4 games. Mural: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The ability to smell colors.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The ability to get aids and stay a virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The power to fit through your cat door but only when the door is unlocked.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The true motor of bliss runs on sex and ice cream with no flavor but calling august to see if life will eat us all or not. And she is. And he is. But the dance is corrupted with none-music and machin touch down there.....

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The Power So That Every Time You Fart You Jump A Inch Higher For A Second.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The power to flip people off with your middle toes.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

The ability to put your whole foot in your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

The power to make objects slightly furry

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The power to look out any window in the world and immediately get it on the face by a bald eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!