The power to be away from the Internet without getting bored.

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the power to fly but your an Altophobic

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The power to only be able to mind control goldfish one at a time

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

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The power to fall asleep before the end of a movie

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To turn into a guy that is tiny but can't do anything but speak.

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The ability to see through walls but only when your blind

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I am the daddy devil of all evil hhaha like A boss

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The power to die whenever you want.

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The power to have a poo at your girlfriend's house and be only 22.2% sure that it will flush

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the power to be immune to bullets only when your not getting shot at.

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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The power to make a sound that attracts whales

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The power to have orgasm everytime a cold breeze rolls in

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To sumon a cheeto named bill every time you say cow.

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having the ability to not piss yourself when your on the toilet.

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The power to resist the Facebook status forces.

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The power to go back to Anti-jokes.

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The power to send emails via pigeon

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The power to hate someone you don't even know

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The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

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The ability to turn into Gary Coleman

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The power to tell time every other second. sometimes.

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The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!