The power to have a poo at your girlfriend's house and be only 22.2% sure that it will flush

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The power to die whenever you want.

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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The ability to teleport.... 1 Centimeter from your current location, It also takes 5 hours to be able to teleport again.

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The power to have orgasm everytime a cold breeze rolls in

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To sumon a cheeto named bill every time you say cow.

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The power to make people think that having no powers is the greatest.power of all

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The power to go back to Anti-jokes.

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The power to burn ashes

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The power to send emails via pigeon

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The power to hate someone you don't even know

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The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

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The power to tell time every other second. sometimes.

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The ability to turn into Gary Coleman

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the power to do something amazing, when no one's looking.

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The power to walk on water, but only if it contains exactly 0.25 ppm of Aluminum.

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The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

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The power to empty your bladder without going to the restroom but only when you really have to poop and it is trying to force its way out.

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The power to make your hair turn green but only if you are holding green hair dye and when you use the power the green hair dye goes away

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the ability to uncontrollably disprove the existence of god but only in front of nuns.

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the power to commit suicide when you are about to die

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The power to eat anything, as long as it's food

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the power to make have wolverines claws but no healing abilitys

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The power of heating things if they are located in microwave.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!