The power to cause cash to spontaneously combust upon touch.

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The ability to say "MISSING FINGERS" on Shitbrix.com

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The power to drive any Lamborghini or other shit expensive car you want. You still need to get a car like that though...

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The ability to be a successful troll.

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When walking down the street, i try to get to a crack in the pavement a few feet ahead of me, and step on it before the next car passes me on the road

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The power to have your finger and toenail grow twice as fast as normal.

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Your average Axel entering a Phone Booth and coming out as... MORAL MAN! Moral: Where the damn do you find a Phone booth nowadays?

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the ability to smile a tooth grin while pooping on your own chest

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To be able to kill a Yak from 47 yards. No more, No less.

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The power to not hear thunder.

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The power to feel pain when your drinking acid.

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The ability to jizz uncontrollably in your pants randomly during the day

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the power to fly two inches above solid ground at the speed you walk

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ur mother so ugly she gave the devil a heart attack

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the power to... SHUT THE F*CK UP

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The power to laugh while laughing.

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The power to zoom in with your eyes, but only when looking to the sun.

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The power to light things on fire with a match

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the power to become retarded

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The power to walk on two legs

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The power to climb up fallen trees

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The power to fly one millimeters above the ground.

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The power to bleed when your grandmother kisses you.

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The ability to turn everything to gold; as long as the original material is gold.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!