The ability to shoot blueberry muffins from my fingertips.

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the power of being republican

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The power to piss rainbows only in torrential downpours.

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the power to eat your computer mouse while its on this site

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The power to become pregnant without the man climaxing (you still have to have sex).

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The power to identify enemies by the color of their skin.

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Power to falsely sense danger whenever you want to sleep.

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the power of piss mountain dew and shit cheeseburgers

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The ability to handle the truth.

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the ability to control ants actions but you can't control more than 1 ant in the same time.

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the power to speak in sign language.

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The ability to turn the page in a book before you read it

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The power to noot be able to see rain.

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the power to make your penis any size you want, only when your wearing sweatpants...

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The ability to run at the speed of light, but being born without limbs.

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the ability to shit active helicopters

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The ability to scratch your balls telepathically.

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The power not to find what you are looking for.

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the ability to swim in a toilet bowl

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The power to metabolize alcohol faster than you can consume it.

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The power to have sex with jessica alba Only if you have Sex with Rosie O'Donnell with a ten inch penis

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The power to destroy the whole universe by any sudden movement. (Our existence rests on you`re shoulders man, don't even breathe nor blink)

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the ability to know what the F#CK gotsie is. WHAT THE FU-

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The power to run on water when there is no water

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!